[Issue #11] 🍀 Fart Face Finnegan Reads Again
Intellectuals can also be immature.
Okay, so, let’s just get right to it. How to explain Fart Face Finnegan?
Many of you know this already, but for those who don’t, Fezziwig has colitis. Tucked inside the cutest little blonde Scottish terrier you’ve ever seen is one of the most poorly functioning canine digestive tracts born in the last decade. In other words, Fezziwig is a Poopy Pants McGee (no relation to Fart Face Finnegan) who eats prescription food and often takes medication to be healthy.
As his mothers, Alison (of Pizza Roll fame) and I, have had to do an untoward amount of horrific things in the name of love. Wiping butts, sourcing hard to find prescription foods, midnight vet visits, 3 AM potty breaks. You name it. From these ashes rose an applicable phrase for just how much you love something: you’d let it fart all over you.
I don’t know about you, but I prefer farts that are NOT aimed in my general direction. (If you didn’t read that in a Monty Python French accent I can’t help you.) Yet raising a colitis riddled cutie makes aiming a pooch fart anywhere but your face incredibly difficult.
Fast forward ten years later and I was enjoying the Oscars 2023 broadcast (something I never thought I’d say) and seated towards the front was nominee Paul Mescal. Mescal is an Irish actor whose leading role in the series “Normal People,” adapted from Sally Rooney’s novel of the same name, catapulted him into the stratosphere. Now, I don’t like to brag, but my physical attraction to Mescal has only been magnified by our six degrees of separation. I won’t reveal the connection here, just text me later.
Seeing him in the front row in that white tuxedo jacket and mulletish hair style I texted the group chat that yes, I would let Mescal fart on me. I know. Gross.
But…
Now that I’ve got you thinking, is there anyone or anything that would turn you into a Fart Face for love? In honor of St. Patrick’s Day this Friday (March 17) I challenge you to choose something that would turn you into a Fart Face Finnegan.
Mine are as follows:
Erik and Fez
Reading and books
Paul Mescal I guess
Your turn. Tell us one or two of the things in the comments below.
Sorry, not all of The RONAREADer can be intellectual. Let’s get back on track with some Irish books.
This week’s book recommendations…
Irish Authors // March 16, 2023
The Tainted by Cauvery Madhavan
This historical Indian-Irish love story takes place in Nandagiri, in Southeast India. Nandagiri is a vibrant but struggling community, overseen by Colonel Aylmer, commander of the Royal Irish Kildare Rangers. The story confronts the identity politics and personal pain of colonialism, where Anglo-Indians in Nandagiri struggle to fit in while the atrocities of the Black and Tans back in Ireland reach the colonies. Over sixty years, passion and politics collide in this novel about the search for true love and belonging.
This novel is not available on Bookshop.org. The link above directs you to Biblio for purchases new and used.
The Happy Couple by Naoise Dolan - Pubs 11/7/23
Celine and Luke are getting married. She’s not that invested in domestic life and he was once a serial cheater, but for the most part they seem happy. Surrounding them are best man Archie, in love with Luke and trying to use work as a distraction; Phoebe, Celine’s sister and bridesmaid, who’s committed to smoking cigs and solving Luke’s sudden disappearances; and Vivian, a wedding guest who observes these players from afar. Sometimes biting, often funny, Dolan’s novel explores love and friendship as it evolves over time.
The Queen of Dirt Island by Donal Ryan
“The Aylward women of Nenagh, Tipperary, are mad about each other, but you wouldn't always think it.” So begins this novel’s blurb, describing a story where four generations of Irish women clash together. Beginning in the 1980s, the story follows the Aylwards, at war with their circumstances (the Troubles looming, the economic downturn of The Celtic Tiger) and the irritating men who flit at the margins. Reviewer (and writer) Amy Bloom calls the novel “…a celebration, in an embroidered, unrestrained, joyful, aphoristic and sometimes profane style…” It’s more experimental in tone than the cover would let on. The book is already sold out on Bookshop, with restocks coming soon.
Cancelling the Irish Catholic Church…
When 62% of the Irish republic electorate voted to legalize same-sex marriage in 2015, the law was one of the largest to vote against a specific dictate from the Catholic church.
This is a powerful edict from a nation once known around the world for its strict Catholic practices. Divorce in Ireland was only made legal in 1995, a referendum that began to signify a critical turn in the public’s allegiance to the Irish Catholic Church. Catholicism, once seen as a critical defiance of the “pagan English,” has become a conservative weight around the more progressive members of Irish society.
While 90% of Irish people attended Catholic mass each week in the past, current percentages hover around 30%, lower even than the United States. Why the decrease in practiced religion? Reporters with NPR attribute much of the decline to past and present sex abuse scandals that first rocked the Irish Catholic church in the 1990s.
This mistrust has filtered into financial and cultural church teachings, like banning gay marriage, that no longer align with the majority. Listen to the 4-minute story below:
The effort to preserve Gaelic…
Gaelic, the national language of Ireland, is one of the earliest written languages in the world. Adapted from the Latin alphabet, Gaelic or “Irish” writing dates back to the sixth century. Along with Greek and Roman, Irish is considered one of the oldest forms of European literature.
Gaelic is still taught to primary and secondary students in Ireland, yet many students leave the classroom and rarely speak Irish in their daily lives. The 2016 census showed around 39.6% of Irish people spoke Gaelic, but only around 4% reported using it everyday.
Yet recent efforts have been made nationwide to encourage people to speak Irish and to preserve the language. The GaelGoer app was launched in September 2022 to connect Gaelic speakers with one another globally. Gaeltachts, or Gaelic speaking communities, have been created on WhatsApp, TikTok, and Instagram.
There’s also Conradh na Gaeilge, the democratic forum of the Irish-speaking community. Since 1893, Conradh na Gaelige has taught Gaelic and raised awareness about the language. It sponsors the international Irish-language festival Seachtain na Gaeilge le Energia; manages the Irish-language information hub PEIG.ie and the Irish-language bookshop An Siopa Leabhar; supports Raidió Rí-Rá; and much more.
Here’s Irish actor Saorise Ronan pronouncing Irish names for late-night host Stephen Colbert.
Your Guinness FAQs Answered…
What color is a Guinness? (Hint: it’s not brown or black.)
Is the creamy top of this Irish beer caused by nitrogen?
Is a Guinness vegan?
All the answers and more from the Guinness experts themselves.
The RONAREADer is going paid!
Fezziwig and I are excited to announce that The RONAREADer newsletter is going paid. In the coming weeks, you’ll start to notice some of The RONAREADer’s content will go behind a paywall. Never fear, the Best Of recap at the end of the month will remain accessible to everyone.
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Something you want to see? More Fez? More Fart Face? Hit reply to say hi or hit us up in the shop.
Get Rec’d,
Wynne + Fezziwig
HOORAY! THE TAINTED is now available for purchase from Bookshop.org. Here's the link: https://bookshop.org/p/books/the-tainted-cauvery-madhavan/10517981?ean=9781916467187
The Celtic Tiger economic boom of the 90s and early 2000s had something to do with the loosening of the Church’s authority over the people as well. It’s easier to dominate a poor group of people than a rich group.